I've gotten better at differentiating real love from the "knock offs" so to speak, and wanted to share what I've learned with you.

Love is actually really simple, but our society confuses it so much with fake look-a-likes (like codependence and enmeshment).

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1. If you’re raised around dysfunction and chaos, you’ll think dysfunction and chaos = love. It’s not.

2. Unconditional love is not unconditional acceptance of bad behavior.

3. Sometimes, you'll confuse a soulmate for a lesson. They're both just as valuable.

4. Love is often confused with enmeshment, but they are worlds apart from each other.

5. Love and grief are two sides of the same coin. And yes, it's still better to have loved.

6. A long-term relationship doesn't necessarily equal love.

7. Just because someone says "love" doesn't mean it's real. Love is probably one of the most poorly understood and manipulated words there is.

8. When you’re used to working hard for approval and validation, it can be hard to imagine someone loving you for who you are, not what you do.

9. If you’re trying so hard to make it work, try letting go. If you’re the only one holding it together, it’s not real.

10. "If it can be destroyed by the truth, it deserves to be." - Carl Sagan

11. If it is repeatedly threatened to be taken away, it’s not love. Love isn’t chosen or turned on/off.

12. There’s a difference of feeling useful and feeling loved. If you don’t differentiate them, you may end up being used without realizing it.

13. Until you love yourself, you'll be chasing for others' love and wonder why it's never enough.

14. "We accept the love we think we deserve." - Stephen Chbosky

Im curious, which of these most spoke to you? Let me know in the comments.